Martial Arts needs years of discipline to master and it is so much more than a form of violence as it is portrayed in films, it is a way of life to avoid any kind of violence and use your skills only for self preservation. There are several techniques from beginner levels till you become a supreme master of the arts but then there are people who will perform techniques that require great skill while looking like complete noobs.
Here are the 10 most kickass techniques that you can avoid on your path to becoming a martial arts master.
10. Concrete Leg Smash – You have a pile of concrete blocks and form an elevated surface you kind of drop your body weight to try and break the blocks with your calf muscles. If you do break the concrete then you have to be picked from your awkward split or you’ll just have to get your foot off the unbroken pieces of concrete in an unsophisticated manner.
9. Hand Hammer – A block of wood as the base with a huge nail ready to be hammered in and a wooden plank to do the hammering but the force comes from a swift jab at the plank to drive the nail into the block of wood. Everything is ok unless the nail is able to split the plank and make its way the wrong side through your palm. Yikes!!
8. Samurai Belly Chop – You’ll need a volunteer with no will to live, ball of steel or someone who has blind trust on your skills. The volunteer lays on an elevated surface with a piece of wood on his belly while you chop the plank with one swift swing of your samurai sword. Practice a bit before you giv a swing at this technique of super judgment.
7. Concrete Head Smash – Another one for the thick skull-ed martial arts master. Have a huge pile of concrete blocks on your head while a couple of guys keep the pile stable and a guy breaks the blocks of concrete with a sledgehammer swinging towards your head. You might want to re-take an IQ test after this one to check of everything is alright up there.
6. Car Elbow Pull – This is pretty simple, you tie a car’s towing point with a tug rope and have a thin piece of wood or metal to tie the ends of the rope to and pull that car towards you. What can possibly go wrong when you try this?
5. Broken Glass Front Flip – You freaky S&M lovers can give it a go. After you have finished the bottle of beer you drank to get tipsy and think this trick is neat, break the bottle up into millions of sharp pieces and lay them on a sack. Aim, ready and front flip your way so that you land on your back with great force onto the broken shards of glass.
4. Coconut Finger Break – Buy a coconut, put it on a stool and knock the living daylights out of the coconut with your knuckles and stab it with your index finger. You can be sure that either the coconut or your finger will break. A neat trick for a trip to the ER.
3. Sledgehammer Face Smash – You will again need a friend with limited brain activity or one who has blind trust on you which is almost the same thing to lie down on the ground with a block of concrete on your face. Get your sledgehammer and swing away, if you get it right, you can try it again with your friend.
2. Two Fingered Handstand – You need to be at supreme levels of mastering the martial arts to even try this technique. You start off with a split then slowly raise your body by balancing yourself on the index and middle fingers on your hands to finish with a flip to stand and end with another split.
1. Eating Molten Lead – Boil lead, pour it in a bowl and drink it. Sure it will be hot but there’s nothing as great as drinking molten lead and spitting out a block of lead. You will live on or your mouth will look like the insides of the Silver Surfer.