Let’s start with a question. Is your child lazy? Shy? Aggressive? Or are they creative, thoughtful, or determined? Why the words we use to describe our child’s matter and how we can describe them a good adjective. Also Read - Dream11 IPL 2020: David Warner Run Out in The Unluckiest Way Ever

One of the biggest milestones in having a baby is choosing the perfect name and if you are choosing an Indian baby boy name it becomes more difficult. Parents recognize a child’s name which becomes a part of their identity and you only get one chance to pick a good one. As a result, parents often take months, trying on different names to see which one will suit their little one. Just like Cornelius might be too big, Ira too small, but Charlie is just right! Also Read - Kerala: 2 Migrant Workers Killed in Quarry Explosion in Ernakulam District, Terror Links Suspected

However, a parent’s duty to provide their child with a good name which does not end just by printing on a birth certificate. The act of giving your child a good name continues throughout their life. Starts with their upbringing to their whole life. Also Read - Irrfan Khan's Son Babil Shares Strong-worded Post in Support of Anurag Kashyap, Says 'Shame MeToo is Misused In Such Malignant Manner'

In a world full of words, we use languages to identify, classify, and connect. Words are also used to label, define, and compare as we use them to describe ourselves and the people around us. Have you ever stopped to think about how the words we speak up with others might show how we treat them? Babies, being the little sponges they are, soak up what they hear about themselves. They pick up each and every word we speak out. What words are you using to define them? Be clear with your words before using any such words to describe your child because it might affect them in many possible ways.

Many a time, we use words that have negative emotional words to describe behavior we do not like in our children, such as being stubborn. Take a minute and think about a child who’s described as stubborn – what comes to mind? You might think of a child that will not leave the toy aisle at the grocery store or simply will not touch their peas at dinner, no matter how much pleading his parents do. But if you take away that prepackaged idea of what stubborn looks like, you remember a child’s behavior can mean and may look like many different things. Stubborn can mean persistent, tenacious, or determined. The same word could just as easily be used to describe the child who rejects to give into peer pressure to bully someone or one who refuses to quit even if she is struggling with multiplication tables in school. How quickly our emotional feelings shift when we move from describing a child who’s as determined instead of stubborn.

In addition to using words with emotions, we also often use words that are polarized, or feel either negative or positive. For example, one can immediately have an idea of what someone described as “snobby” will be like, just as we do for someone called “sweet.” When we use these sweet words to describe children, we are often giving them a label of absolutes. We are saying rude behavior equals a rude child, most of the time with no exceptions. As a result, one instance of rude behavior is now taken to present a child’s entire personality.

Saying that a child should not be described through these negative words does not mean that children never display these negative behaviours or traits. They all do at some point or another and those behaviors should never be acceptable.

However, it is important to remember that the behavior can be negative, not the child. The action is “bad,” not the child.

Criticizing a behavior is different than criticizing a child. When we criticize a behavior, we are actually showing disapproval for a specific action but when we criticize a child, we are expressing disapproval for being—we show that we don’t approve of whom they are. When we give a child a name like “selfish” for not wanting to share their Halloween candy, we are not describing a selfish act; we are using adjectives for a selfish child. When we criticize a child for being instead of doing, we are writing a bad name on a nametag that they will carry with them wherever they go.

So, how do we change our negative attitudes to positive ones? Michigan State University Extension has some ideas on how to give your children great names!

Pay attention. The first step is paying attention. Observe what words you use to describe your child, whether you say them aloud or not. Challenge yourself to make a list and think about the names given to them.

Switch them up. Take those negative names and switch them out for positive ones. Point out your child’s strengths, Observe their good behavior and give them good names just for being themselves. When your child begins an art project and ends with scraps of paper, scissors, tape and glue strewn about the entire kitchen, do you use words like messy or as creative and artistic? Is baby hides behind you at family gatherings hesitant to connect with people called shy or is she merely calm, contemplative, or insightful?

Let your child pick their own name. Always Encourage your child to figure out who they are, what personality traits they possess, and to come up with good names for themselves.

Words are very important which plays an important role in one’s life. They are powerful. The name we use, either privately or publicly, to explain our children can and will affect how we view and treat them, as well as how they view and treat themselves. You have the power to provide your child with a positive, supportive, and empowering inner voice. It all starts with a good name. So, make sure you choose a good one and give your child a positive life.

This is a featured content