“He remembers a fellow classmate asking him if he is a girl or a boy—that was one of his first recollections of being bullied,” Japjee’s older sister, 20-year-old Aasees, said. “The classmate questioned his gender because he had long hair.”
From there, the bullying only got worse, Aasees added. Just six years later, on October 4, 2012, when her brother was in the eighth grade, Japjee was brutally assaulted by a fellow classmate who had been yelling hateful slurs at him the entire day.
“He punched him about six to seven times and broke his nose. He needed to have two surgeries to recover from the dislocation of his cheekbones and jaw,” Aasees said. “It’s left lifelong impacts on his health. It’s caused him sinus issues that he can’t recover from—it’s changed his breathing patterns.”
Adding insult to injury, Aasees claims the school administration did little to help her brother and made him wait for 40 minutes—when his family arrived—before sending him to the hospital.
“When we got to the school, there was an ice pack in his hand and blood all over him,” Aasees recalled. “We all still heard the kids yelling things like ‘go back to your country.’ He [the student who had assaulted him] had only been suspended for a few days.”
At that school, Aasees noted, the punishment would have been the same for violating the school uniform policy—it was essentially just a slap on the wrist. But rather than letting his assault bring the Singh family down, they have used Japjee’s story as a means of spreading awareness to bullying.
Earlier this month—also known as National Bullying Prevention Month—the brother-sister duo joined forces with the White House Initiative on Asian American and Pacific Islanders (WHIAAPI), the Sikh Coalition, and the Coalition of Asian Pacifics in Entertainment (CAPE) for the Act to Change anti-bullying campaign.
“We know the source of the discrimination is lack of education. I believe that the real issue is how we, as a society, are dealing with the understanding of minority communities—especially when their customs and appearances and beliefs don’t match our own,” Aasees said.
[Photo Courtesy: Sikh Coalition]
“I know that’s where the bullying is coming from—people don’t know any better. There is a lot of misinformation out there. People are misguided when it comes to stereotypes. [Some people] believe that people with brown skin and a turban are automatically terrorists,” she added.
According the campaign’s website, one in five students report being bullied, and the problem is more prevalent among minority communities. Half of all Asian American students in New York City reported biased-based harassment.
“We’ve all got to take the small steps so that we can take great strides as a whole. Everyone has to start doing their part for us to get there,” Aasees explained. “My family is just as American as my next door neighbor. We celebrate Thanksgiving. We go to baseball games.”
“We’re all the same, and if we could just take that step to look past my brother’s turban or my long hair, we could really be a stronger community,” she added. “There is a lot at stake, and it’s not a risk that we as a society can afford to take because bullying has lifelong impacts.”
As for Japjee, Aasees says that her brother continues to use his experience as a means to help those around him and spread awareness. And though the Singh family has never had the opportunity to confront Japjee’s attacker, his sister says they have forgiven him.
“My family and I have long forgiven Japjee’s attacker. We understand that the problem does not lie within the individual – it lies within our society as a whole. My family’s experiences are a reflection of how society feels about “others,” she said. “We need to teach our kids compassion and encourage them to embrace their peers’ unique qualities. We have to move past the external differences and recognize that we are all one.”
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[Photo Courtesy: Sikh Coalition]