Hollywood was left bewildered as Charlie Sheen admitted to have tested positive for HIV. The actor had paid millions to keep this a secret for years and when he came out in the open, amazed and left many of his co-stars shell shocked. The 50-year-old talks about his struggle that he went through in the last four years and that he had done everything within his powers to “kicking the disease’s ass”. However, things have a taken a turn for the worse.

The support within the industry has also been subdue while his infamous outlandish lifestyle, which bore a stark resemblance to his on-screen character, Charlie Harper from the cult hit show, Two and Half Men. Sheen played the role for eight seasons before being thrown out of the show for recurring substance and alcohol problems that had disrupted shoots frequently. It is rumoured that Sheen had over 200 sexual partners and paid over 10 million dollars to extortionists to keep his medical condition under wraps. Here is the open letter that Charlie Sheen had penned, describing the painful process of learning about the disease and managing his road to recovery.

Roughly four years ago, I suddenly found myself in the throws [sic] of a seismic and debilitating three-day clustermigraine like headache. I was emergently hospitalized with what I believed to be a brain tumor or perhaps some unknown pathology. I was partially correct. Following a battery of endless tests, that included a hideous spinal tap, it was sadly and shockingly revealed to me that I was, in fact, positive for HIV.

The news was a ‘mule kick’ to my soul. Those impossible words I absorbed and then tried to convince myself, that I was stuck, suspended, or even stranded inside some kind of alternate reality or nightmare, were to the absolute contrary. I was awake. It was true … reality.

Under the brilliant and perfect care of Dr. Robert Huizenga as well as “the” leading infectious disease expert in the known universe, I began a rigorous and intensive treatment program. Not missing a beat, a med dose, or one shred of guidance, quickly my viral loads became undetectable. Like every other challenge in my life, again, I was victorious and kicking this disease’s ass. I wish my story had ended there. Unfortunately, for my family and myself, it had only just begun.