Yesteryear poster girl Parveen Babi’s personal life has been fodder to many speculations for years. Even years after her death, there continues to be a mystery element attached to her life and times. No wonder then, today on her birthday anniversary (April 4), the actress has become a talking point on the internet. The actress, who ruled hearts once upon a time in Bollywood, had a tragic ending and that made her life story all the most intriguing for many. Interestingly, it continues to enthrall the new generation, most of whom might be unaware to her cinema.
Her story has been the perfect rise and fall saga, complemented by complexities of her relationships. Right from her much talked about affair with Kabir Bedi and alleged relationship with Amitabh Bachchan to the unfulfilled love story with Mahesh Bhatt, there’s been an unnerving mystery attached to Parveen Babi’s love life. Interestingly, she was seen as someone who is ahead of her times since she didn’t care about talking unabashedly about her relationships in her interviews and didn’t mind indulging in some PDA. Her picture where she is seen lip locking with Kabir Bedi was much talked about and could have been the perfect ‘viral material’ if we had internet back then.
Praveen was known for her bold persona onscreen and she was as bold off screen as well. All the tragedies and mystery around her life and death might paint her as someone who didn’t fight it out or gave up too soon, but the reality is far from what is perceived! In one of her interviews with a celebrity magazine Stardust dated September 1977, Parveen candidly spoke about her equation with Kabir Khan and her statements prove that she was everything that a woman needs to be in a relationship! (ALSO READ: When Parveen Babi took a jibe at Amitabh Bachchan’s acting talent and his looks – watch video)
You are as important as the man you are dating!
Parveen Babi was at the peak of her career while Kabir Bedi was getting international offers. The long distance between them created a crack in their relationship. She had a career in India, while Kabir was looking to settle abroad. She decided to part ways amicably and let him follow his dreams while she got on to fulfilling her ambitions. In the interview, she said, “I have never resented Kabir’s success. But to be with him, I’d have to follow him around all over the world. As a woman I have my ego, my pride, I could never become a man’s tag!” (ALSO READ: Parveen Babi birthday special: These throwback pictures will take you back to the life and times of the yesteryear poster girl!)
Marriage is not a solution!
All people in a complicated relationship have once in their life heard of these wise words that say, ‘if you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they are yours’! And yet, in all testing, heartbreaking situations, most of us think of marriage as a permanent resolution that will put an end to all the problems in the relationship. Parveen begged to differ. In the interview, when quizzed if she ever thought that a marriage with Kabir Bedi would bring more security and permanency to their relationship, she said, “I would never have gone into a marriage with Kabir just to keep him by my side. I wanted a normal, secure relationship and not a bondage for Kabir and me. If we were to marry, it would be because it was the natural thing to do and not because it was the solution. (ALSO READ: Parveen Babi birthday: Most loved songs of the late style icon of Bollywood!)
Not letting situations turn her bitter!
How would you react when you want something and still can’t help beyond a point to make things work? Parveen Babi had the perfect solution when Kabir’s career took off and it perhaps became more important for him than his love life. Parveen was of the opinion, “He’s getting opportunities in the West and I don’t expect him to kick them down for my sake. I set him free since this is the time when he has to make the best of his career without any hassles. It’s not a sacrifice on my part, I am not a martyr, it’s just more resignation to a situation I can’t control.”
Knowing where to draw the line!
People fall in love and fall out of love! And the law of attraction most of the times is not ruled by one’s relationship status! While we know this fact, how easily can we accept it? Parveen knew all about the world of glamour and how the men always enjoy female attention. She knew better than to get possessive and drive herself crazy about her man and the love and adulation he got from the opposite sex. When she sensed that a third person might rock her boat, she decided to distance herself. “Kabir is now exposed to all kinds of new experiences, in terms of glamour and women. I have seen it for myself that all those females are ready to throw themselves at him. And if Kabir gets attracted to anyone, I could hardly blame him. But I can’t be expected to take it all and sit back and be treated like a door mat,” said Parveen for she knew that like most men, Kabir wasn’t immune to women. While she was ready to not put the blame on him, she knew that she is not one to play second fiddle to any woman in real life!
Falling down but picking herself up again!
Not all relationships meet a happy ending but how you come out of a failed relationship depends on how strong mentally you are. She called Kabir one of her most intense and ultimate emotional crises but she didn’t let the parting break her down. “I haven’t let the parting shatter me to pieces because I know there is nobody to pick me up,” she confessed in the interview further revealing that even though they were not lovers anymore, she was making no effort to forget Kabir, the person. “I have spent two beautiful years with him and every moment of those years have been worth it,” she said from a space that can only be commanded by a woman who is confident in her skin and about herself.
A lot has been written about Parveen Babi’s love life and most stories would point to a possibility that the failed relationships took a toll on her. But this heartening interview where Parveen bares her soul and sets her feelings exposed tells a different story. It is a story of a woman who knew how to love and how to lose in love. Who knew that love, though important, cannot be central to one’s life! On her birth anniversary today, India.com hopes that people out there look beyond the scandalous and tragic tales about Parveen Babi’s love life and take a few lessons about how to handle relationships like a boss!